This was going to be my first recipe post. But it's not. So DON'T do what I did.
Neither Joey nor I were feeling very hungry tonight. Probably a combination of getting over strep throat and dreary, cold weather. But we have a toddler, so dinner is not optional around here. If Charlotte doesn't eat dinner, she wakes up at 2 in the morning begging for "eat its". Not a good midnight snack experience for anybody. So here's my "nobody wants dinner recipe":
By the way, Dyno-mom, you may want to look away for this one! I can hear the text messages dinging at me from the future!
"Cookies" for dinner?
Take 1 acorn squash, roast it at 400 degrees for an hour. Turn off the oven, leave the squash inside and forget it. Until the next day when you need to roast peanuts. Say "whoops!" To yourself, then put it in the fridge. Forget it for several more days.
Pull said acorn squash out on the evening in question. Beat 3 tablespoons butter into the squash with a hand mixer.
As you're cutting up butter, listen to your daughter fussing and whining, and allow her to eat a tablespoon of butter straight off the stick.
A pinch of salt maybe? Think about just making acorn squash mash and adding cheese. Decide not to because your toddler is begging you for cheese. Add honey instead.
Now listen to your daughter beg you for honey until you finally give in and give her a spoonful. Now you get to listen to her beg for more "honey spoon" all evening!
The Baby will start screaming at this point, practically throwing herself out of her (very illegal) perch in the Bumbo on the counter top. (No, really, she didn't almost fall, I swear) Go nurse for 15 minutes or so while your husband gives water to the toddler who dumps it all over the kitchen floor.
Look in the pantry, find nutmeg, and coconut flour, decide to make cookies for dinner. that should appease a toddler bent on honey, right? And healthy-ish too!
Mix squash mixture with 1 1/2 cups coconut flour, some homemade vanilla, some cinnamon, some chopped candied ginger and walnuts... sounds good, right?
While you're putting away the spices in the pantry, be sure to find the bag of REAL coconut flour. The mystery substance you just added to your "cookies" is definitely not coconut flour. hmmmm.... what could it be? What did I buy recently and forget to transfer from the grocery store bulk bag?
Arrowroot powder? Really? Did i just put 1 1/2 cups of arrowroot powder in my child's dinner?!?!
Quickly add 1 cup of real coconut flour, but not in time to save the first batch of cookies that's already baking in the oven. Oh dear.
During the second batch of cookies, find the REAL arrowroot powder in the pantry. You KNEW you didn't buy 5 pounds of it! Still unsure of the mystery powder floating in your pastry thick cookies, you turn to your husband.
"Oh, that's the white flour we keep around to thicken sauces and stuff."- he must have forgotten to put the label tag thingy back on.
Well, this is no longer a healthy dinner then i guess. But maybe they'll turn out ok?
OH! Whoops, you forgot an egg! I bet you could add it to the 3rd batch, right?
In the mean time, heat up the leftover cheesy brown rice you made a few days ago for the fussy, hungry toddler. Give her a few spoonfuls, along with a "cookie".
Now, take a guess what Charlotte had for dinner?
And I heated up the leftover Salmon Chowder we had for dinner the night before.
The "Cookies" will now be relabeled "Dog Treats". That is, if THEY will eat them!
***Linking up with Real Food Wednesdays with Kelly the Kitchen Kop
Neither Joey nor I were feeling very hungry tonight. Probably a combination of getting over strep throat and dreary, cold weather. But we have a toddler, so dinner is not optional around here. If Charlotte doesn't eat dinner, she wakes up at 2 in the morning begging for "eat its". Not a good midnight snack experience for anybody. So here's my "nobody wants dinner recipe":
By the way, Dyno-mom, you may want to look away for this one! I can hear the text messages dinging at me from the future!
"Cookies" for dinner?
Take 1 acorn squash, roast it at 400 degrees for an hour. Turn off the oven, leave the squash inside and forget it. Until the next day when you need to roast peanuts. Say "whoops!" To yourself, then put it in the fridge. Forget it for several more days.
Pull said acorn squash out on the evening in question. Beat 3 tablespoons butter into the squash with a hand mixer.
As you're cutting up butter, listen to your daughter fussing and whining, and allow her to eat a tablespoon of butter straight off the stick.
A pinch of salt maybe? Think about just making acorn squash mash and adding cheese. Decide not to because your toddler is begging you for cheese. Add honey instead.
Now listen to your daughter beg you for honey until you finally give in and give her a spoonful. Now you get to listen to her beg for more "honey spoon" all evening!
 |
| my pantry, in great state of disarray |
The Baby will start screaming at this point, practically throwing herself out of her (very illegal) perch in the Bumbo on the counter top. (No, really, she didn't almost fall, I swear) Go nurse for 15 minutes or so while your husband gives water to the toddler who dumps it all over the kitchen floor.
Look in the pantry, find nutmeg, and coconut flour, decide to make cookies for dinner. that should appease a toddler bent on honey, right? And healthy-ish too!
Mix squash mixture with 1 1/2 cups coconut flour, some homemade vanilla, some cinnamon, some chopped candied ginger and walnuts... sounds good, right?
While you're putting away the spices in the pantry, be sure to find the bag of REAL coconut flour. The mystery substance you just added to your "cookies" is definitely not coconut flour. hmmmm.... what could it be? What did I buy recently and forget to transfer from the grocery store bulk bag?
Arrowroot powder? Really? Did i just put 1 1/2 cups of arrowroot powder in my child's dinner?!?!
Quickly add 1 cup of real coconut flour, but not in time to save the first batch of cookies that's already baking in the oven. Oh dear.
During the second batch of cookies, find the REAL arrowroot powder in the pantry. You KNEW you didn't buy 5 pounds of it! Still unsure of the mystery powder floating in your pastry thick cookies, you turn to your husband.
 |
| mystery flour cookie |
Well, this is no longer a healthy dinner then i guess. But maybe they'll turn out ok?
OH! Whoops, you forgot an egg! I bet you could add it to the 3rd batch, right?
 |
| 3 batches- first one on the left with just the mystery powder, second in the middle with added coconut, 3rd with an added egg. |
 |
| Charlotte is offered a cookie |
 |
| She picks the rice over the cookie |
And I heated up the leftover Salmon Chowder we had for dinner the night before.
The "Cookies" will now be relabeled "Dog Treats". That is, if THEY will eat them!
***Linking up with Real Food Wednesdays with Kelly the Kitchen Kop
This made me smile!!!
ReplyDeleteincidentally, the dogs actually do kind of like them.
ReplyDelete